The #10for20Challenge is all about self-care. The concept was initially shared by Dani Donovan three years ago, when she proposed it as an alternative to New Year’s resolutions. When I discovered the challenge on Twitter last month, I was immediately interested because I absolutely hate New Year’s Resolutions. Let me explain.
Whoever decided to say that the first of the year is the ‘perfect time to set new goals’ has obviously never been inside my ADHD brain. Sure. I went through the motions of setting New Year’s resolutions for many years, because it’s practically an expectation. But that also meant for me that every year I was expected by what…society? to come up with a list of goals to improve myself.
So for several years, yes I made the damn list and for each and every one of those years I did little to nothing to work towards the goals on the list. But it certainly was fun to tote it around for a month and tell everyone all the great things I was planning on doing.
Of course then came the feelings of embarrassment, anxiety, and shame around having not measured up yet again. But that is part of the problem. New Year’s resolutions feel like something that is forced on me from the outside. And that’s a great recipe for this ADHDer to say “screw it” and move along with my life.
The #10for20Challenge is different
10 for 20 is about you. It’s about taking back some of your time each day—20 minutes—in order to focus on something that already makes you happy or something that you want to do more of. Start by making a list of ten things that fit that description, and then pick any one of them to do each day. It’s as simple as that.
My 10 for 20 Challenge list looks like this:
1. Talk with someone about something that matters
3. Move my body
4. Listen to music
5. Organize something
6. Help solve a problem
7. Play a video game
9. Play with my kids
10. Learn about something new
When I look at that list, I don’t get worried about not measuring up, I get excited by seeing things I love and things that make me feel better after I’ve done them. It looks like a list of friends waiting to greet me at the end of a long day, as well as a few acquaintances who make me feel better the more I get to know them.
How the challenge improves your self-care
Where it really shines is when taken in the context of the following illustration I found on Twitter. It shows how all too often we try using just one thing for all of our self-care. And when that one thing gets stale we are left without, and end up just providing more fuel for anxiety and depression.
The strength of the #10for20Challenge is in its flexibility. Its a menu of “can-do” items rather than “to-do” or “must-do” items. And when you are able to make this time for yourself, odds are good that with a list of ten you’ll have something to do that’s also available at the time you want to do it..
As someone who has struggled with self-care for most of my adult life, I implore you to explore this idea. Try it out. Make a list. Post it where you can see it or have easy access to it. And then set aside 20 minutes a day to do something on that list. For you.
And screw the fact that it’s already February—these aren’t your mom and dad’s New Year’s resolutions. There is nothing that says it’s too early or too late to start anything. With ADHD you’ve got to strike when the iron is hot, not when some arbitrary date rolls around. So get started now and enjoy the positive change that comes to your life.
Have you tried the 10 for 20 Challenge? Are you going to try it now? Feel free to reach out and share your experiences with it by commenting below or sharing on social media using the hashtag:
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